


Empty Houses Empty hearts

by mommasboy



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentions of Cancer, Monsters, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Trauma
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-03
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-07-30 12:51:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20097520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mommasboy/pseuds/mommasboy
Summary: EDITING- WIP----"The house was empty again. Of course, It’s not like Steve expected any different. It was always empty, bleak white space. Space filled with shadows. Ghost of his past loitered around. Stuck between unfinished family portraits and squeaky clean floors that Steve was not responsible for."Steve has always been forced to be alone in a house that was too big for him. But can Billy fill that empty space in his heart? Can he do something to help Billy also?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A look into the interpersonal relationships of Billy Hargrove and Steve Harrington, as well as the emotional effects of child neglect and abuse.

The house was empty again. Of course, It’s not like Steve expected any different. It was always an empty, bleak white space. Space filled with shadows. Ghost of his past loitered around. Stuck between unfinished family portraits and squeaky clean floors that Steve was not responsible for. 

He shuts the door behind him, the afternoon sunlight slowly fading, leaving the big house in an ever-present, dark. 

Steve made his way past those squeaky squeaky floors and into the kitchen. He was not getting something to eat. No, his stomach twisted at the thought. Just getting a glass of water, room temperature. 

He hated how his fingers shook every time he thought he saw a shadow move a little too unnaturally. 

The quietness of the house feeding his paranoia. 

He shouldn’t be like this. Nancy was fine. Jonathan was fine. The kids were fine. Yet, he wasn’t. 

Months had passed, but sometimes it felt like it happened yesterday. 

He gulped the water down with the thirst of a man stuck in a desert for weeks. But he guesses that’s what he felt like sometimes, like he was stuck in a desert at night. It was always night, no oasis, no light. Just endless cold nights. 

He couldn’t reach anyone. No, he was surrounded by sand in all sides.

He rinses the glass and put it back in the cupboard. 

He hands have stopped shaking. For now. But he knows it will come back. It always does. 

  


.

Billy slams his hand against the locker next to a kids head. The sound bounces off the walls and makes its way to Steve. He looks at Billy, like everyone else. 

“What the fuck did you just say!?” Billy screams in the kids' faces. The kid, some guy Steve don’t recognize, seems scared. He looked to be a junior, like Billy. 

It was kind of a surprise to see Billy raise his voice like this. Well, it wouldn’t be at the beginning of the year but Billy has been kind of mellowed out. Not as loud, not as brash. Ever since that day. Over time the marks on him that Billy left had faded. And since he had more important things to deal with, Billy had faded with them. Well kind of. 

Steve doesn’t know what happened but he knew he couldn’t just stand there. So he approaches Billy with all the calm he can muster. 

“Hargrove.” He calls out when he’s near enough. 

Billy’s eyes snap towards him, and he can read Billy. That overwhelming anger is familiar. 

Billy looks back at the kid, then steps back, huffs and leaves the scene. Going who knows where. 

The kid lets out a breath, then looks at Steve. 

He gives Steve a shaky smile. “Thanks man, I owe you a big one. I don’t know what I would do if he tried to fight me.” 

Steve smiles back a reassuringly. 

“No problem man,” He looks at the kids lanky body and thick-rimmed glasses. “Yeah, you don’t exactly look like the fighter type.” 

The kid let out a laugh that sounded more like a sigh of relief. 

“So,” Steve began, leaning closer to the kid. “What did you say to make him that angry.” 

The kids straighten his posture and coughs awkwardly. “Uh, I uh ...told him he needed to get some help because he has anger management issues.” 

Steve almost facepalms. If he knew one thing about Billy Hargrove, it’s that he doesn’t like being told what to do. Not at all. And Steve thinks he especially doesn’t like being told about his issues. 

“That was a bad move, dude.” 

The lanky kid sighed. “I know..! I know ... but...I was only trying to defend my friend. Like there was an intense debate going on in a.p literature and Billy said some shit to my friend. He was devastated man. The guy hates confrontation so he couldn’t even say anything back. So I had to do something….” 

He knows that feeling of fierce protection. 

“Yeah, that’s great standing up for your friends and all but you gotta pick your battles dude.” 

The kid looked down, slightly embarrassed. “I just thought since he hadn’t fought in like forever I had a chance to somehow get through to him.” 

Steve chuckled. “And look where that got you.” 

The kid’s face went hot, his thin hands immediately went up to cover it. “Aaaaahh...I know, it was bad.” 

The bell’s tune started up, signaling that next period, gym for Steve, was about to start. 

“Well, I gotta go to class.” Steve says hugging his books to his chest. 

“Ye-yeah I got to go too.” The kid sputters out. He fixes up his kind of disheveled look. 

“See you around, eh?” Steves waves to him as he walks towards the locker rooms. 

The kid waves back looking kind of bewildered. 

Steve sighs in relief. He was saved by the bell literally. Ever since that whole thing with Nancy. him losing his social status and the whole upside down ordeal. Steve’s social stamina has decreased severely. 

He walks into the locker trying hard not to make eye contact with any of the stupid boys at the height puberty that would pick a fight with anyone they set their eyes on about any old stupid shit.

It smelled like the worst combination of sweaty socks, shit-stained underwear and moss in the locker room. 

A place that Steve hates so much he would rather change in a public bathroom. At least bathrooms offer privacy. In here he can’t avoid teens literally taking off everything but getting angry and calling people gay if they so much take a glance. So the best possible thing you can do is keep your head down and change as quickly as humanly possible. 

Now back in Steve’s days as a normal teenager™ he used to partake in activities such as slapping the ass of his fellow teenager with a wet towel, but those days are long over. 

He doesn’t see the need in those actions anymore. Mostly because now he has a general sense of just how life is. So he is doing what he needs to do to survive the rest of high school. No frivolous activities were necessary. 

But it’s not like his mindset is the same for everyone. So he still gets stares and jaunts as he walks to his locker. Of course, he ignores them all. As they are all a ploy for cheap laughs. At his expense. He can’t feel too bad for himself though, because it’s not like he never did this to some more unfortunate souls. He gets what’s coming to him. He deserves this. 

“Don’t you guys ever shut your mouths?” 

A loud booming voice, a voice that Steve would recognize anywhere, asks. 

The locker room falls quiet. Steve was in the middle of getting his shoes out of his locker when he stops. He looks over to his right. Near the door is Billy’s locker. Some people are staring at their own lockers trying to avoid eye contact with the new king of Hawkins High. While others are forgoing their fear for curiosity. 

Who was Billy talking to Steve wonders? But Billy continues changing without saying another word. Like he already got his point across. 

He takes off his shirt and he’s standing there in his full Billyness, looking almost unaware of the eyes on him. Or maybe he doesn’t care. And here Steve is, staring at the guy who beat him senseless and now understanding how. The guy is fucking ripped. Not like bodybuilder ripped that Steve sees on health magazines but like, ripped nonetheless. And Steve doesn’t know how to explain it but suddenly Steve has to look away or... So he looks back at his own locker, taking off his own shirt and quickly changing into his gym uniform. 

Billy finished changing and walked out. Just like that the air in the locker room returned to normal. 

“Who the FUCK was he talking too?” Some guy putting on a brave act asked his friends. 

“I don’t know but I know he wasn’t talking to me.” 

“Right, me too. Like I would’ve totally said something back if he was talking to me.” 

The locker room erupted in loud boisterous chatter about why Billy Hargrove was so goddamn angry all the time. 

.

It wasn’t farfetched to say that Billy Hargrove was surrounded by an air of indifference between his sudden and seemingly random bouts of anger. To most people, it looks like the only emotion he can show is anger. Just another teenage boy doing what teenage boys do they would reason. Everyone got angry, but nobody got angry like Billy Hargrove. You can see the transition from man to monster. The way his face twist from a smile, like he’s enjoying himself, to blind rage. It is almost frightening. Like coming face to face with a wild animal. Someone that is just not able to destroy you, but willing. Steve has witnessed that first hand. Yet he is not afraid of Billy Hargrove. He is not just saying that to be brave. He is just not afraid of Billy Hargrove. Which is strange because even Billy Hargrove is afraid of Billy Hargrove. 

  


He sees through him. Through the careful barrier he has put between himself and the rest of the world. At least Steve thinks he sees. Maybe he projecting himself onto Billy. So desperate to find someone who can understand him. 

Perhaps he could find that in Billy.


	2. Fear not

When Dustin ask if he wants to binge watch ghostbusters with him this friday. Steve wants to say no. After all he got homework to do and college stuff to work on and he should really be using every moment he has to study because his grades are not that great (even though they got exponentially better because of his ruined social life leaving little options other than using his now seemingly endless amounts of free time to study) and if he wants to get into even the most accepting of colleges he has got to work his ass off. So he have to say no, he have to...but Dustin looks so pleading, and it’s not like he has anyone else to hang out with, Mike and Eleven have been all over each other all school year, Max and Lucas want a little time to themselves, and Will, well Will. He knows what it feels like to be lonely and he can’t fight those puppy eyes.   
“Fine.” Steve groans out, hitting his head against the wheel of his car, knowing he lost this time.   
“Yay!” Dustin cheers, grinning.   
Steve can’t help but smile. The kid might be little devil sometimes but he sure is adorable. So of course Steve can’t help but give him what he wants.   
“But only this one time!” He tries to sound strict, holding his finger in front of Dustin’s face.  
“Ok, ok.” Dustin nods. 

\\\\\

Steve is caught up in his daily life. Caught up in the nightmares. Caught up in the drama and caught up in Billy Hargrove. One of those days he found himself watching Billy Hargrove. This surprises him. He does not know why he is watching Billy Hargrove. Billy is like a storm, one that moves like a snake and brews without warning. He doesn’t know why he is so fascinated with the combustion of Billy Hargrove. Like he doesn’t understand why people like pro-wrestling or boxing. He doesn’t understand how people can stand all that blood and gore. The snap of a bone breaking and the hurt of it. All of that just reminds him now, just how powerless he truly is.   
And yet he watches Billy. Like he is some kind of play. He can’t help himself. When Billy is somewhere people’s eyes get drawn in like a magnet. He commands the attention.  
Steve is just prey to him.   
Billy is calm. At least he appears to be. He doesn’t slam his locker shut. He is not scowling or glaring at anyone in the near radius. His face is set into a line. He scans the hallway not really looking for anything. His eyes connects with Steves. And Steve's heart quickens at the thought of being caught staring. Billy smiles and walks over. His ever large presence almost overwhelms Steve, but he stands his ground.   
“Harrington, take a picture if you want, I’ll even pose.” He says, amused.   
Steve frowns. “I wasn’t staring.” He is not gonna further Billy’s ego.   
“Oh really?” Billy smirks. “So it was not your eyes that I noticed following me around in the hallways all week.” He looks smug, like he knows he has the upper hand.   
“What, you couldn’t get enough of last time?” The threat is evident in his voice.   
“I’m not afraid of you, Billy Hargrove.” He locks eyes with Billy and glares. He wants Billy to understand that it’s 100% true. He is not afraid of Billy, he never was.   
The smirk falls of Billy’s face, replaced with a blank look.   
“You should be.” Billy almost whispers, moving closer to Steve. Steve falters slightly, unnerved by Billy invading his space so much.   
Billy raise a hand and slams his locker close. “You should be.” He says louder this time, smirk coming back on his face. And with that he turns his back to Steve, walking down the hallway then sauntering into a random classroom.   
Steve lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, knees almost faltering. Face hot. 

What the fuck is wrong with him? 

///

“This is gonna be so awesome!” Dustin giggles. He’s holding onto a huge tub of popcorn. 

“Thank you so much for watching him Steve.” Ms.Henderson says as she grabs her keys and makes it to the front door to grab her coat. “I wouldn’t know what to do if you didn’t agree to watch him. I’m really grateful, I usually have no time to hang out with my girlfriends but with you here it makes things so much easier. I don’t to worry about Dustin burning down the house. Oh god i just don’t know how to thank you.”   
“It’s fine Ms.Henderson. I like hanging out with Dustin.” Steve says honestly.   
“Ah,” Ms.Henderson sighs. “I still hope it’s not too much trouble. Well dinner’s in the fridge so you can just reheat it if you want, I also left money for pizza.” And with that she was out the door without looking back.   
Steve laughs. Ms.Henderson is quite weird.   
Turning to Dustin who was busy fiddling with the tv. “Well champ, you want pizza or your mom’s dinner?”   
“Pizza of course.” Dustin says without looking back.   
Steve goes to the kitchen where the phone is to make the phone call. The kitchen was weirdly dark and had a big window next to the sink that had a view of the forest. Since it was dark, it was hard to make out anything. Steve picks up the phone dialing the number to the pizza place. The phone started ringing, and ringing and ringing. Steve puts down the phone back in the holder. Maybe it was broken.   
“Hey, Dustin pizza might not be the best option.” He calls out.   
No answer.   
Didn’t he hear him?   
“Dustin?” He calls out again.   
still no answer.   
Steve walks out of the kitchen and into the living room.   
“Dustin?”   
No Dustin. He wasn’t by the tv. Or anywhere else in the room.   
Steve’s breath quicken. No way. Everything is fine. Dustin is probably in the bathroom or something.   
keep telling yourself that  
“Shit.” Steve heads hurriedly towards the bathroom.   
“You better be there.”   
He opens the door to the bathroom, half expecting Dustin to curse at him about privacy but nothing. No one’s in there.   
Steve stands there, holding on to the door, heart pounding.   
This couldn’t be happening.   
Suddenly he feels a hand on his back. “Steve?”   
Steve jumps slightly. “HOLY SHIT. Dustin you can’t creep up on me like that.” He sighs, holding his chest.   
“Dude, you seriously have issues.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fateful meeting at a lake

Steve lays in bed wide awake that night. He is one of the between moments. Between driving Dustin where he wants to go(that kid sure has a busy social life) doing school work and whatever else he has planned that day, his mind wanders. And suddenly he's caught up. Caught in scenes of the upside down replaying before him, but this time he's not so lucky. This time he can’t escape. How can he have nightmares when he’s still awake?  
They’re hallucinations he thinks. That is the only explanation he can come up with. There is nothing he can do during them. He can’t even move as he looks at all of the possibilities. All the ways the kids could’ve been killed. 

Steve doesn’t want to think about that. So he throws on his coat and a pair of sweatpants and the nearest shoes he can find, grab his car keys and head out the door.  
It’s ass cold outside when Steve steps out the door. But anything is better than being in that house, anything to take his mind off things. He gets in his car and quickly turns the heater on. And he’s never been so glad he has rich parents. Getting him a car was the best thing his parents ever did for him. You could go anywhere you want without having to ask anyone for a ride, that level of freedom was almost too much for Steve. Too bad he got stuck driving some kids around. Sometimes he wishes they were here though. 

Steve have no idea where he’s going but he just wants to drive. Maybe if he drives far enough he’ll get somewhere. 

He didn’t always hate his parents not being there. He is a teenager so of course it’s nice sometimes to not have your parents there. But that house was too big to be in by himself, and sometimes he just wanted his mom. No matter how embarrassing and childish that sounded.

Steve found himself driving to the lake, he doesn’t know why but his hands seem to take him there. It was surrounded by trees on all sides except for the paths that leads to it. The water glitter from the moonlight. Steve stepped out of his car and took a deep breath, taking in the atmosphere.  
It was so cold outside that Steve almost regret stepping out his car, but he can see the clear blue of the water so much better from here so he guess the sacrifice was worth it. 

“Harrington.” Said a voice behind and Steve’s heart almost lurches out of his throat.  
He turns his head to the left to find a disinterested Billy Hargrove staring blankly at him holding onto a still lit cigarette.  
“Jesus, you can’t just do that to a guy.” Steve wheezes out.  
Billy just rolls his eyes.  
“So what are you doing here?” Steve ask after a beat to break the awkward silence that have settled between them.  
“What am I doing here?” Billy repeats incredulously. “You’re the one invading my safe space here Harrington.”  
It’s not yours asshole  
Steve sighs. Of all the people to meet here.  
It was like super fucking late too so if Hargrove decides to murder him right here he won’t even be able to call for help. God help him. 

“Look man, I just came out here to relax.”  
Billy’s steel blue eyes travel over his face, Steve wants to look away but he can’t bring himself to.  
“Relax, huh. What rough night pretty boy.” Billy taunts as he leans against his car. 

“Yes actually, it’s just one of those nights.” Steve’s fingers twitch. He just wants to get in his car and get out of here but he doesn’t want to look like a pussy so he just grabs his pajama pants instead. And that when he realizes he’s wearing fucking pajama pants random quite frankly beat up sneakers, and his big fluffy coat, in front of Billy Hargrove. He feels his face go hot.  
Goddamn it. He doesn’t what Billy thinks of him, but it’s still super embarrassing.  
Billy finishes his cig, throws it to the ground and stomp it out with his biker boots.  
Billy takes a breath and Steve braces.  
“Look,” He starts. “I’m not here to give you trouble so you can just do...whatever the fuck you came here to do and I’ll just leave or whatever.”  
Steve’s eyes double. What the fuck happened to Billy Hargrove.  
“No you can stay, I don’t mind.”  
Billy raises an eyebrow. “Sure you don't.” He scoffs.  
Steve crosses his hands over his chest. “What is that supposed to mean.”  
“I’m the guy who beat your face in and terrorized your pack of rugrats, you’re supposed to mind.”  
Steve frowns. “Well I don’t ok.”  
The bang that comes from Billy slamming his hand against his car surprises Steve. 

“You see this is what I don’t fucking get about you, when you’re suppossed to be angry, you’re somehow not.”  
Steve sucks in a deep breath, he looks towards the lake. “Let’s just say I have bigger things to be worried about.”  
“Oh yeah like what.”  
“Like none of your business, Hargrove.”  
Billy chuckles. “Wow that’s cold.”  
Steve turns to Billy, the other boy have an easy smile on his.  
“So do you just go around punching cars?”

“Only when I’m with you, Baby.” Billy smirks.  
Steve blushes. “Is your hand ok?”  
“Worried about me now, Steve-o.”  
“Yes asshole. My kindness extends to even psychopaths.” Steve rolls his eyes.  
To his surprise, Billy extends his hand forward. “Feels fine to me.”  
His knuckles were a little bruised but that was about it.  
“Well I don’t have bandages in my car, but if you leave it like that it could end up hurting a whole lot more.”  
“It hurts a whole lot right now.”  
“Thought you said it was fine.”  
“I’m a liar too, don’t you know.”  
“You’re such a dumbass.” Steve laughs.  
“Do you wanna like come to my house, I got some bandages there.” Steve did not know why he was asking this. Did the cold freeze his brain cells or something holy shit. Well Billy’s gonna say no anyways.  
“Well how could I pass up the opportunity to go to king Steve’s less than humble abode.”  
Of course that asshole accepted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hoped you guys enjoyed this chapter. I'm thinking redoing the first chapter because I of course I'm not satisfied with it like all of my writing.


End file.
